In an unexpected and lighthearted twist to contentious confirmation hearings, Mukasey agreed to answer final questions from Democrat Senators while being waterboarded.

What was the hardest part of the interrogation? “Water kept streaming up my nose every time Senator Feinstein dunked me, so I had to repeat myself a few times,” an obviously unharmed Mukasey explained.

“It’s true, water was everywhere” agreed an also soaked Feinstein, “We all had a good laugh. When he winked at me I almost peed myself.”

Another Democrat Senator Charles E. Schumer of New York, “I don’t know of a single Democrat inclined not to support him. In fact, this is what I whispered to Mr. Mukasey when I was helping dry him off.”

TV Pundit John Stewart judged the hearings as such a success that he suggested that future Presedential debates include questioning the candidates as they are waterboarded.

The Fox debate plans come one week after the long anticipated announcement last week that all three women would be running for President in 2020.

Miss Clinton:

As my mother, Mr. Edwards, Mr. Obama and three dozen Republicans have shown, it is never too early to begin campaigning. My main goal will be to remove American troops from Iraq during my first full year in office – 2021.

Jenna Bush:

Unfortunately I am not yet old enough to run for President so I am targeting the 2020 election. I think that works for my twin sister, although I forget exactly how old she is.

Barbara Bush:

Jenna has agreed to let me be the Vice-President. As Uncle Dick has explained, this is where the real power lies.

Beginning Sunday Evening, following the Simpson’s, Fox will air weekly debates between the three ladies for the next 13 years.

Below, Bush twins fight over who gets to be the Vice President.

Washington – The United States last year provided nearly half of the weapons sold to the developing world, as major arms sales to the most unstable regions – many already engaged in conflict – grew to the highest level in eight years, new US government figures show.

According to the annual assessment, the United States supplied $8.1 billion worth of weapons to developing countries in 2005 – 45.8 percent of the total and far more than second-ranked Russia with 15 percent and Britain with a little more than 13 percent. Source

George W Bush:

“If the Iranians were to have a nuclear weapon they could proliferate.”—Washington D.C., March 21, 2006

As evidence grows that Iran is supplying weapons to Iraq, White House sources reveal that the USA has also found clear and convincing evidence that many of the weapons being used by Iraqi Insurgents have been supplied by America.

We have captured hundreds of weapons in the past week from insurgents that were clearly manufactured in America, said an Pentagon source who requested anonymity due to the sensitivity of the information.

America has been a major weapons supplier for decades, selling weapons to every side in most armed conflicts,” said White House Spokesman Tony Snowjob. “They need to stop now, the USA will not tolerate America sending weapons to our enemies.”

“America has a long reputation for supplying arms to any and all. For example, in 1999, the United States supplied arms or military technology to more than 92% of the conflicts under way. Source

Snowjob Continued. ” Every year, the U.S. Congressional Research Service releases a report looking at arms transfers to the developing world. The 2006 report is titled Conventional Arms Transfers to Developing Nations, 1998-2005 PDF formatted document.

The report shows that approximately 80% of weapons sold to developing countries are sold by the 5 permanent members of the security council (America, Russia, France, China, UK) and Germany.

“This is clearly unacceptable. The USA will not tolerate this threat to freedom. We will do everything in its powers to stop these countries.”

Fox News Analyst Brit Hume. “Clearly America is thumbing their nose at the USA. They are clearly a threat to our oil interests in the Middle East. President Bush shouldn’t tolerate this threat to our sovereignty.”

An anonymous Taliban leader admitted to Fox News earlier today: “Its True, we receive much of our military supplies from America. In the 80s during the Russian invasion, our supplier was the United States, we change with the times.”

Rumors are circulating that Condoleeza Rice, at her United Nations speech next week, will reveal CIA satellite photos of American trucks driving through the mid-west that are in fact Chemical weapons factories.

Bush insisted the intelligence was accurate:

fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can’t get fooled again.